Spell It Out.

After a number of attempts to get the customer service agent on the phone to understand his name,
my Asian American friend Appappa decided to spell it out.

“A for apple,” he began. “P for pineapple, p for pineapple, a for apple, p for pineapple, p for—”

The flustered agent interrupted.

“I have a better idea,” she said. “Just tell me how many apples and how many pineapples.”

Little Johnny wasn’t a very good at speller.
One day, during a spelling exam, the teacher wrote the word “new” on the blackboard.

“Now,” she asked Johnny, “what word would we have if we placed a “K” in the front?”

After thinking a few seconds, Johnny said, “Canoe?”

Before setting off on a business trip to Tulsa,
I called the hotel where I’d be staying to see if they had a gym.

The hotel receptionist’s sigh had a tinge of exasperation in it when she answered.

“We have over 300 guests at at this facility,” she said. “Does this ‘Jim’ have a last name?”

Jake came rushing in to his Dad.
“Dad!” he puffed, “Is it true that an apple a day keeps the doctor away?”

“That’s what they say”, said his Dad.

“Well, give me an apple quick? I’ve just broken the doctor’s window!”

Customers are so innocent!
Customer: “I’ve been ringing 0700-2300 for two days and can’t get through to enquiries; can you help?”

Operator: “Where did you get the number from, sir?”

Customer: “It was on the door to the Travel Centre”.

Operator: “Sir, they are our opening and closing hours.”

A prince was put under a spell so that he could speak only one word each year.
If he didn’t speak for two years, the following year he could speak two words and so on.

One day, he fell in love with a beautiful lady.

He refrained from speaking for two whole years so he could call her “my darling.”

But then he wanted to tell her he loved her, so he waited three more years.

At the end of these five years, he wanted to ask her to marry him, so he waited another four years.

Finally, as the ninth year of silence ended, he led the lady to the most romantic place in the kingdom and said, “My darling, I love you! Will you marry me?”

And the lady said, “Pardon?”

Related Posts

“Don’t call your father—no one will believe you.” She called anyway: how one phone call uncovered five years of hidden abuse

For five years, Amelia Hartwell mastered the art of looking good. In public, she’s the refined wife of Logan Mercer, a self-made millionaire with a Tribeca penthouse,…

He returned early to surprise his family—but what he saw in the greenhouse chilled him to the bone… How long had this been going on?

Graham Caldwell did not plan to return home that morning. His private jet had landed early after a deal in Chicago fell apart faster than his team…

She went through a “routine check”—and was handcuffed for asking a legal question… Who were they really targeting?

Major General Naomi Pierce hadn’t expected to attract attention in Greenfield. Dressed in civilian clothes, she was driving a rented SUV to a quiet dinner with an…

She entered her own company disguised as a contractor—what she overheard in the cafeteria led her to set a trap for Monday.

When Eleanor Price accepted the CEO position at Northbridge Dynamics, she knew she was getting into trouble. The company was profitable, fast-growing, and renowned in the enterprise…

“Go play in your room, honey.” She smiled in terror as she secretly backed up the recordings her husband never expected.

“Mommy, my princess game became popular,” announced seven-year-old Lily Harper, holding up her tablet like a trophy. Naomi Harper, eight months pregnant, smiled automatically, expecting bright cartoons…

She got a last-minute upgrade to first class with her baby—and a billionaire tried to take her seat… until the captain uttered a single sentence

The promotion was supposed to be a small miracle, not a public test. Maya Lewis stood at the British Airways gate at JFK Airport with her eight-month-old…