A priest is driving down the road when he comes across a pig lying dead in the road.
He contacts the police to inform them of his find.
A cocky desk sergeant laughed and said ‘Did you give it the last rites?’
‘No’ said the priest ‘I thought I’d inform his next of kin first!’
Father O’Malley was driving back from Sunday mass, humming along to a hymn on the radio, when his car screeched to a halt.
There in the middle of the road was a large pig, sprawled out like it had just lost a wrestling match with a freight train.
Concerned, Father O’Malley stepped out of his car, approached the unfortunate creature, and gave a solemn nod. “Well, bless your heart, son,” he muttered.
“The Lord works in mysterious ways.”
Not knowing what else to do, he pulled out his phone and dialed the local police station.
“Officer Murphy speaking,” came the voice on the line.
“Hello, this is Father O’Malley. I’ve come across a… well, a rather sizable pig lying dead in the middle of Clover Road.”
Officer Murphy, sensing an opportunity for some humor, couldn’t resist. “Ah, Father,” he said with a chuckle. “Did you, by any chance, give it the last rites?”
Without missing a beat, Father O’Malley replied, “No, Officer, I thought I’d contact its next of kin first. But if you’d like, I can head over to your mother’s house right away.”
For a moment, there was silence on the line. Then, a stifled laugh burst through.
“Touché, Father,” Officer Murphy said, trying to keep his composure. “We’ll send someone to take care of it.”
Father O’Malley hung up, climbed back into his car, and drove away, smiling to himself.
He knew he’d probably have to hear about this one at the next parish potluck, but some jokes were worth it.
And so, the pig found peace, the officer got a lesson in wit, and Father O’Malley? He had a new story to tell at confessions.