A lady went to the bar on a cruise ship

A lady went to the bar on a cruise ship and ordered a Scotch with two drops of water.

The bartender gave her the drink, and she said, “I’m on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday, and it’s today.”

The bartender said, “Now that it’s your birthday, this one’s on me.”

When the lady finished her drink, a woman to her right said, “I want to buy you a drink too.”

The lady said, “Thank you, how sweet of you. Okay, bartender, I’d like another Scotch with two drops of water. ”

“Coming up,” said the bartender.

When she finished drinking, a man to her left said, “I want to buy you a drink too.”

The lady said, “Thank you very much, my dear. Bartender, I’ll have another Scotch with two drops of water. ”

“Coming right up,” the bartender said.

When he gave her the drink, this time, he said, “Ma’am, I’m dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?”

The old woman giggled, and replied, “Sonny, when you’re my age, you’ve learned how to hold your liquor. Water, however, is a whole other issue.”

LOL!!

Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!

An old lady went to a bank

An old lady went to a bank intending to withdraw money…

The old lady handed her bank card to a bank teller and said, “I would like to withdraw $500.”

The female teller told her, “For withdrawals less than $5,000, please use the ATM.”

The old lady then asked, “Why?” The teller irritably told her, “These are rules. Please leave if there is no other matter. There is a queue behind you.” She then returned the card to the old lady.

The old lady remained silent. But she returned the card to the teller and said, “Please help me withdraw all the money I have.”

The teller was astonished when she checked the account balance. She nodded her head, leaned down, and said to the old lady, “My apologies Granny, you have $3.5 million in your account and our bank does not have so much cash currently. Could you make an appointment and come again tomorrow?”

The old lady then asked, “How much am I able to withdraw now?”

The teller told her, “Any amount up to $300,000”

The old lady then told the teller that she wanted to withdraw $300,000 from her account.

The teller did so quickly and handed it to the old lady respectfully.

The old lady kept $500 in her bag and asked the teller to deposit the balance of $299,500 back into her account.

The moral of this tale…

Don’t be difficult with old people, they spent a lifetime learning the skills.

Related Posts

The Taxi Driver Who Became Family

When my mother died, I thought the worst pain was behind me. Then, two weeks later, I discovered my husband’s affair while I was nine months pregnant….

With a heavy heart, we announce the passing of this multi-talented actress at 35 – she was taken from us far too soon

Disney and horror fans alike are mourning the loss of actress Daveigh Chase, whose unforgettable performances helped define an entire generation of moviegoers. Best known for voicing…

The Secret I Accidentally Shared at Family Dinner

When I was about six years old, my entire family gathered around the large wooden dining table that only appeared during holidays. The room smelled like roasted…

A Wealthy Widow Married a Younger Man — Then She Made a Shocking Discovery Days Later

Margaret thought she’d finally found comfort. Ten days later, she vanished without a word. A small town watched in disbelief as whispers of romance turned into accusations…

10 MIN AGO: Unable to bear the pressure any longer, Kate Middleton broke down in tears

In a heartbreaking revelation that has left the world stunned and millions of supporters in tears, Catherine, Princess of Wales — known lovingly across the globe as…

I became a mother at nineteen, facing a world that doubted my ability to provide, but my son Liam became my entire universe

I became a mother at nineteen, facing a world that doubted my ability to provide, but my son Liam became my entire universe. As he approached his…